Candy Clay, Take Two

The second recipe is based on candy melting disks and is very simple.  But, despite the simplicity there were some variations among the recipes I found.  All of them used the candy melting disks combined with corn syrup.  The weight of the disks used varied from 10 oz. to 16 oz.,  but oddly the amount of corn syrup always remained at 1/3 cup.  The other difference was the amount of cooling time, this varied from 3 hours to overnight.  For my version I decided to use 14 ounces of disks (1/3 cup corn syrup) and cool for 3 hours.  

Here is how things went for me.

I slowly melted 14 oz. of candy disks, and then stirred in 1/3 cup corn syrup.  The disk were initially very smooth and creamy with a matte surface after melting.  I noticed a change in the quality of the disks as soon as I added the syrup.  It became gooier  and much more shinny.  At first I thought this was the effect of the cool syrup lowering the temperature but the texture change persisted even after the syrup was fully incorporated and warmed.

 

Candy Clay Cooling on Silicone Mat

I then poured the mixture out onto a silicone mat to cool.  Waxed paper would also be suitable.  You can see the clay is very shiny.  There seemed to be a layer of oil on the surface of the clay.  Most of the oil was pulled back into the clay as it cooled.  I then covered the clay with waxed paper to avoid cat prints from my very curious pets.

Candy Clay Bear Made With Melting Disk Recipe

After three hours of cooling, I made bear in the picture above.  

Here is how the clay rated against my criterion.

• Stickiness:  A little less sticky than the first recipe I tried.  The stickiness here was due to oil from the melting disks and not a sugar stickiness.  B-
• Color Fast: OOPS!  I forgot to color this clay, so I don’t know the answer here.
• Consistency: As you can see in the photo above, this clay held the shape much better than the first recipe.   A-
• Taste: Like white chocolate.  B+  But, I’m sure that the quality of the melting disks used could vary a great deal.  It will pretty much taste like what ever disks you purchase.

Red: "Frosting" Clay, White: Melting Disk Clay

Over all I think I liked the melting disk clay better.  A disadvantage of this clay is that you need to use the stove to melt the disks; clearly this can’t just be handed to young kids for an “on their own” project.  Since I will prep this clay in advance, the use of the stove is not an issue, and the active prep time for this clay was less than the frosting clay.  The white clay seemed to handle much better, and held shapes much better.  As you can see in the photo above, the frosting like clay continued to slump even more after I took the first photo.  I am also considering just leaving the melting disk clay white and letting the kids color their creations with food coloring markers.  I will probably chill them in the fridge for a while before coloring.  I know some kids will love sculpting with the clay, some will just eat it and some will head straight for the sand box.  But everyone will be busy.

Plans for our party are going well and I’m really looking forward to the day.  I will post some photos of the kid’s sculptures (and maybe mine) after the party next month.

BTW, I finished the invites yesterday.  I think they will be a hit!

Candy Birthday Party Invites. The invitation is printed on the reverse of the wrapper.

 

 

 

Candy Clay

Birthday parties are a big deal at our house.  We get a little crazy and always try to do something out of the ordinary.  Last year we had a Pokemon party.  Since the characters in Pokemon frequently are on the road and camp out a lot, we did too.  I borrowed a digital projector and we showed Pokemon movies on the back of the house while the kids roasted marshmallows.  Later they all retired to tents.  You can see the cake I made on the Photos page.

This year S has requested a “candy” party.  As an activity, I thought we should make some sort of edible candy craft.  Candy clay seems the perfect thing.  Many of the guests bring younger siblings and pleasing them all is sometimes problematic.  If they are not interested in sculpting with it, they can still eat it.

I started hunting around the net looking for recipes and found lots of variations of one that used candy melting disks and one other that was frosting like.  I decided it might be a good idea to test the recipes first.  The potential for disaster seems pretty high.  (Our party will be outside and I can just see 8 children covered in sticky goo that leaves brightly covered stains on everything after we turn the hose on them!)  I would like a candy clay is not too sticky, is relatively color fast, has a consistency similar to playdoh, and would taste good.  I decided to try the frosting like recipe first. Here it is: 

• 3 cups powdered sugar
• 1/4 cup corn syrup
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 cup margarine, softened
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• food coloring

1. Combine powdered sugar, corn syrup, salt, margarine, and vanilla extract in a large bowl.  

2. Mix until the dough doesn’t feel sticky.  You may add more powdered sugar to make it less sticky 1/4 to 1/3 cup.  be sure to add it slowly and stop when the dough feels dry.

3. Divide the dough into smaller balls and put each ball into a separate bowl.

4. Add a few drops of food coloring to each bowl.  Make the dough in each bowl a different color.

5. Mix the food coloring into the dough with a spoon so you don’t stain your hands.  Once the food coloring starts ti blend in, use your hands to knead it in.

6. Sculpt a creation.  Eat them soon as they will become rock hard over time.

THE RESULTS:

I made a 1/2 recipe all in the same color to keep things simple.  The clay took a lot of mixing to get it to come together.  I did have to add the extra 1/3 cup of powdered sugar, ABOUT THREE TIMES!  The clay was very sticky for a long time.  I added about 1 teaspoon of red paste color.  When I got to the point of kneading the clay, I added MORE powdered sugar, maybe a cup.  I stopped when the surface of the clay would crack a little when I pushed down on it.  Despite all the extra sugar this clay still gets sticky when your hands get warm.  It is sugar after all.  So, here is how it rates on my criterion.

• Stickiness:  Not too bad, although doing this on a sunny deck may be problematic.  C
• Color Fast: Also, not bad a after all the mixing was done and it rested for a minute or two. B
• Consistency: As you can see in the photo below, there is a lot of slump.  C-
• Taste: Like frosting.  S thought we should have something that tasted more like candy, or that we flavor each color differently.  That would be easily accomplished by substituting various extracts for the vanilla.

Candy Clay Bear made with the "Frosting" Recipe

So, I think I will test the other recipe sometime next week.  Look for Candy Clay Take 2.

“Why was I adopted?”

A question I have been waiting to hear.  Until yesterday I only had a vague idea about what I would say.  Then I read this post. The Truth as You Know It

Ok, good, thank-you, I won’t make that mistake. BUT, what DO I say? The next post on my Blog Surfer was this, NO LIE!    Thank You

“Because I wanted her to be safe.”  That simple phrase is so full of truth, and the love that ALL parents have for our children.  We all spend so much energy and worry about their safety each waking moment.  This is the truth as I know it.  Is this the whole answer?  No.  But it is the core, the seed from which logic springs in a world that frequently defies logic.

Thank-you to both of these women for sharing with all of us.  It is so hard to work through these issues alone.  The advice and experiences of others are so valuable to me.  

 

BTW, I received word from our agency that one family has permission to travel.  The first one in a year.  I pray they are safe as they travel.  Today on Tin Que Huong two posts about Vietnam.  One about a Dengue fever outbreak.  The other about a US human rights group pleading with Vietnam to not interfere with the funeral of a prominent (dissident) religious leader.  What mother wouldn’t worry?

Dear Tiger,

As I was mending you today I realized that I owe you a debt of thanks.  You have been my son’s faithful friend for five and a half years and I couldn’t be more grateful.  You have been by his side during dark nights, storms, sickness and more.  You sat in the back seat of the car and kept him company as I drove.  You have cuddled S when I could not, while I was at work, running errands, tending to the business of life.  You have given hugs during time-outs, when I had to put on the “stern mother” act.  And, when I wanted to drop the act you looked over his shoulder at me and said with your blue eyes “It’s Ok mom, he will be all right, hold your ground.”    You are a great playmate and always know the rules to the games that baffle me.  You can sing the songs, and do the dances, and you have even told jokes.  How do you do it all?  I believe you have even taken the blame for some minor mischief. 

Today I added to your stuffing and mended the small hole that began to grow at your neck again.  Today I wondered how long you would stay with my son.  Would you always understand his problems in ways that I cannot?  How long do we have before your love is not enough and he needs more than cuddles and hugs to make everything Ok?  As you grow threadbare, he grows wiser and will soon need answers about who he is and why he is a member of this family.  I know that I cannot provide everything he will need, especially all the answers.   Just as you have helped both of us over the years, we will need to seek help from others in the future.  But dear Tiger, do not fear, you will always have a home with me even if S no longer has a need for you.  For I will need you to help me remember the wonderful, beautiful years we spent together;  S, Tiger and me.  

Too Much to Digest

The news recently has been too much to digest.  The beginning was the warning about adoptions from Vietnam and announcement summarizing “Irregularities” from the US Embassy in Hanoi in late April.  These sent me reeling.  Not only did it put into question our current efforts to adopt but also cast doubt upon the adoption we completed more than 6 years ago.  

Shortly after that announcement I discovered WordPress and the community of those concerned about adoption.  I read blogs from other adoptive parents, I read blogs of other waiting families, I read blogs of birth/first/other mothers, I read blogs from parents in Vietnam in the process of bringing their children home, I read the pages of organizations like Adoption Buzz and  Ethica, and I read the blogs of adult adoptees, (most notable, that of Julia, whose blog I discovered the day of her death.)  I have learned so much, but I’m still trying to digest it all.  I feel a bit like my brain has burst like an over-filled balloon.  And there is more to learn and absorb!

So, bear with me as I try to work through all this information.  First the things I am sure of:

 

1. The adoption of S was never an act of charity.  It was an act of selfishness.  I wanted to patch a hole in my life, so that I could find joy each day instead of emptiness.  I am so irritated, angry with people who tell me “He is so lucky you found him.”   It is not true, S is a wonderful person who would’ve found happiness with another family in the US, or France or preferably even Vietnam.  When I respond that “I am the lucky one.”  it sounds petty and wrong, and they don’t get it and I need to find a better way to express this.  ”I am lucky to be with him.”  is a start.

 

2. Adoption number 2 has a different purpose.  S needs family.  Family that understands S’s history, shares his story.  Someone to be connected to after I and J are gone.  Sure, it’s for me too, but there is more to it this time.  

 

Things I need to work out: 

1. Do we continue with our current adoption plans?  I think so.  I was very anxious about the slowness of the process this time, but now I feel the need to be patient.  Now, the time that this is taking means that our adoption service provider and the USCIS is proceeding in a moral fashion and taking the time to follow the procedures that will ensure our child was actually an orphan.

2. How do I do a better job of parenting S?  How do I balance my needs as a parent (source of income and other support) with his needs?  In particular, his need to have access/exposure (I still need the right word for this.) to an Asian community?  I have made some attempts at this but they seem feeble, and so they probably are feeble.  I have tried to make some things available in terms of proximity; having them in the house; books, art, the movies I watch, the kinds of food I serve and the way I serve it.  I have arranged trips to watch Lion Dances at a martial arts school where they have teams.  This felt a bit forced, I enjoyed it hugely, but I’m not sure S cared or understood.  Does it matter if he understands when he is 6, (meaning it would soak in for later life)?  Do I keep it up until he says “enough mom, I don’t care”?  Or do I wait for him to request the information and then help him?  Maybe the strategy is to use the first tactic when he is young and the second when he is older?  While there are many Asian children in our school system, it would not be a wild guess to say most of them are adoptees, helpful, but not the same as a community of Asian families.  If we were to move, how would he be accepted in a Asian community when he has Caucasian parents?  Understanding what is needed is much simpler than supplying it, but I still don’t even know what to supply.

3. I’m not really sure where I stand on the “Second Choice” or “Plan B” discussions I have been reading.  While I understand the significance of this to the child, and that it has HUGE significance for them, I feel no need to to make apologies for our path to adoption.  How a person ends up in a position in life is complex and largely due to chance and not according to any plan.  How do you explain or justify how you met your life’s partner, or your relationship with anyone for that matter?!  (Standard cliché: “Life is what happens to you while you are making plans.”)   The idea that adoption is somehow “the great consolation prize of life” infuriates me.  I hope that society makes some progress on this idea while I am still alive, but in the mean time . . . .   How do I talk about this with my son?   It doesn’t matter how I feel.

 
4. Am I at ease about our previous adoption?  Almost?  After re-reading the announcement regarding the “irregularities” it seemed things got worse when the program re-opened instead of better.  I knew that corruption was a possibility during our first adoption, but  I never dreamed one human could treat another in the ways described in the announcement.  I was naive, I trusted the people I was working with, I had faith in the system.  This will haunt me, always.

 
5. If we do not receive a referral before the MOU expires, what do we do next?  How do I go about choosing to end this quest or prolonging it?

Oh, there is still more, but I have enough set out before me for this meal.  I will be lucky to digest what is already on the table.                                                                                         

The “F” Word

The other day as I was cleaning up the dinner dishes S (6 year old son) says to me, “Mom, I know what the “F” word is” in a tone that denoted he was proud of his new knowledge. Fearing the worst but also curious I replied, “Oh really, what is the “F” word?” and instantly began to concentrate on a calm reaction. S looked a little nervous, and quietly replied, “Fart”. I must not have been able to keep a complete poker face and he followed with “That is the “F” word isn’t it?”. I happily replied (relived that I would not have to have a “talk” with him that day) “Yes, it’s one of them.”